Moment of Impact

Recently I watched a movie (for those of you who know me this is not a shock in the slightest), but let me tell you, this movie was weird. Weirder than weird. It was one of those movies that makes you think and you have no idea what you are thinking about until three days later. And then it hit me. I should write a blog post about one of the main concepts from the movie in order to organize my thought. So here I will do just that.

Your life is marked by a small number of moments of impact. It is these moments of impact that change our lives, either for the good or the bad. But ultimately, it is those few moments. The main character of the movie continued on to explain that the moments of impact are what is most important. Those are the days you remember and the days you cherish/hate. Those are what "determine" the outcome of your life.

I don't know that I necessarily agree with the main character. If I was defined by the impact moments of my life, I feel that I would be a very shallow person. Based on this theory, you might be a very angry or hurt person. Based on this theory, you could be a lot of things that you aren't.

I like to think that we are defined and changed by the way that we react to these moments of impact. It's our attitude, our thoughts, and our feelings toward the event. Yes, you may have a huge physical change or emotional scar after the moment of impact, but you still get to choose how you respond.

Recently in my classroom of elementary students, we had a discussion about how important it is that we respond to each other with respect and love. I was teaching it to those students and I am preaching it to you. Even if in the situation you are responding to yourself with respect and love, give yourself that much.

So as you may be experiencing, or have recently experienced, a moment of impact, challenge yourself to think and consider what your reaction will be. Will it be of respect and love? Will you choose how it effects your life?

Inspired by: "The Hunger Games"

"The only thing greater than fear is hope." Yes, a cheesy line from The Hunger Games, but it is more than that. It is truly a great piece of wisdom. Not the kind of wisdom found in a fortune cookie, but rather the kind of wisdom that your grandmother passes down to you. It's a solid piece of advice.

I am a scared person. Let's be honest, I am usually a baby. Especially when it comes to the unknown. To overcome this flaw, one coping mechanism that I have learned is to be hopeful. I'm not talking, "I think I am going to win the lottery" hopeful, but "I will come out of this situation a better/stronger person" hopeful. Because when it comes down to it, you are defined by the way that you come out of any given situation.

So, how do I find hope when it seems like all is lost and will never get better? Well, I have developed a few techniques thanks to some awesome people that I have in my life. Here they are listed below:

1. Stop and look at the small things. Notice that a new flower is coming up out of the soil. Notice the mom's love for her child as she hushes the baby and walks out of the meeting. Notice the curiosity of a child as they ask you the 50th question in a row. Stop, look, and appreciate.
 

2. Write it all out. Yep, you've heard me say this before. But it really helps me so that means that it must help everyone, right? (note my sarcasm) But it may help you, you never know. Write a letter to someone you know. Write a letter to yourself to either keep or destroy. Write a thank you note to someone who is supporting you in your tough times. Just write.
 

3. Do something for someone else. Plain and simple. Maybe you can't do much... but I am sure that you can do something. So do it, be selfless and do something. Chances are you will love it.
 

4. Seek God and the little nuggets of wisdom that He has already given to us. Some verses that I like are: Isaiah 41:10; Psalm 34:4; Psalm 28:7. Maybe you have your own, maybe you want to check out mine. Either way, it is one of the strongest sources of hope.
 

Do you have another way that you combat fear and gain hope? Go ahead and write it down in the comments section so that we can all learn how to not be trapped by fear... together!

"And she's... safe!"

In my classroom I use the phrase, "Please be safe" multiple times a day. As I send the kids off at the end of the day, I say, "Have a safe and wonderful afternoon!" But recently, I started to think about what I was actually saying. Safety. What a huge concept. But what an important and life changing concept. Every human, whether they know it, craves safety. Safety both physically and emotionally. 

I think that we seek places and people that will allow us to be safe. A few weeks ago, I returned to a place that I love and as soon as I drove onto the property, I instantly felt a safe peace. When I am angry or hurt what do I do? I find those certain people in my life. The safe ones. The ones that I know won't judge or get angry (unless it is anger out of love). I bet you do the same thing.

 

The first tier of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs is safety. I never really realized how big of a deal it is to feel safe. Maybe for you to realize, you need to think of the times you felt unsafe. Was it at night when you were walking to your car in the empty parking lot? Was it with a significant other or friend who didn't realize how important of a person you were? See, safety is important.

So why on earth, wouldn't we wish safety upon everyone? Why wouldn't we try and try to make it so that were someone's safe person? Someone's safe place? I challenge you, to make sure that you let those around you know that you are someone they can talk to, someone that they can be around, somewhere where they can go. And maybe, throughout this entire post, you have been thinking of a certain person or place where you feel safe... let that person know that they are your safety in life. Thank them for working to make and keep it that way.

Love Letters Are Magical

     What if you picked up a pen and paper, and wrote exactly what you wanted someone to say to you? What if you allowed yourself to entertain the thoughts that you wanted to hear? Maybe it is for someone to say, "It's ok to be you." Maybe it is someone to tell you that not knowing is ok. Maybe you simply need to hear that you are loved.

     That's part of the mission of moreloveletters.com. Now, I don't want this to turn into an advertisement or a commercial for their site, but rather an explanation of a concept that I think is amazing (I just want to give them the credit for the concept). 

     I am a words kind of person. When I need to say something, it is best if I write it. So that's what I do! I write letters. I simply write to a random stranger what I needed to hear that day. And let me tell you, it is its own kind of therapy. Something about seeing the magical words written in black and white. Reading them (though I cognitively know I have written them) helps me to not feel so alone.

     So, grab your fancy stationary (or a note-card or lined paper works too) and write a love letter! When you have composed your letter, simply leave it somewhere with a note on the outside that says "To whomever finds this"! And spread some love in this crazy world!

Change Monster

     "Ahhh! It's coming!" It slowly approaches you... your heart beats faster... your palms are sweaty... you haven't taken a full breath in minutes... Beware! The change is coming!!

     Yes, I am talking about that scary word: change. The word that in theory really only means "to alter." Whether that means alter your life, appearance, or daily flow of things... it is scary. And you know what? I really don't know how we make the actual change less scary. I don't have a crystal ball that will let me know whether the change will be good or bad. However, I heard a speaker at a presentation say something that made a lot of sense. He said, "People are not afraid of the change, but rather they are afraid of not being prepared for the change."

     Afraid of not being prepared? Yep. That sounds just like me. And if you admit it to yourself, it probably sounds a little like you too. From the time we are born, we are taught to be prepared for things. Whether that is being prepared for a car ride when you are little by taking toys, being prepared to go to middle school by attending the orientation, preparing for your high school graduation by choosing a college your senior year, or saving money so that you are prepared to move out on your own.

     So why not prepare for a change? I could go into many examples of ways to prepare such as visualization, research, and list making... but I won't because there are way too many changes in our lives that I would never be able to even begin to cover strategies. But rather, I hope that you will think about this idea next time you begin to completely freak out over a 

change that you may be facing.

     Preparation is the best way to embrace change.

Schedule Space

     I have been thinking about space. No, not the planets and stars. But rather space, as in elbow room or room to breathe. More specifically, I have been thinking about space in the way of my life and what it looks like. 

     Do you have that friend that hovers obnoxiously close over your shoulder as you are on the computer trying to show them something? They are so close that you can feel their warm semi-smelly breathe on the back of your neck. If you were to simply turn your head to look left or right, you would be cheek to cheek? Yep. We have all have that friend. And if you don't... I mean I'm not saying it is you... but... all signs point to... (just kidding... mostly). Most times you want to turn around to that person (maybe you have) and said something along the lines of, "Can't I just have a little space to breathe??"

     Bingo. That moment. That is what I am talking about. When you can't even focus on what you are going to do because you just need a little room. Don't we do that to ourselves? There was a time when my daily schedule looked something like this:

           6:00am- Wake Up. 6:05- Be in shower. 6:15- Out of shower. Make lunch. 6:20- Do hair. 6:30-Be eating breakfast. 6:35- Check email while eating. 6:45- Be done eating. Make-up. 6:50- Make Bed. 6:55- Put Shoes on. 6:57- Put coat on. 7:00- Close door to apartment. Walk to car.

     I did not leave myself a single minute to breathe. I didn't give myself any space. In our day in age, if you aren't constantly going or doing something, you are seen as lazy. You are seen as the person who is wasting your day. But maybe, just maybe, that person with the breathing space, is the only person who isn't going to go insane. They chose to give themselves some space. Some room to breathe and digest what is happening around them. 

     "But Katie, how can I do that? I have so much to do with classes and work and family and this commitment and that commitment!" Simple. Schedule space time. Recently my pastor told us that you schedule what is important to you. Aren't you important to you? Be realistic in your space goal. Don't schedule 2 hours to sit and think... you'll get 15 minutes into it and find something else you have to do. Think of how long you need to breathe. I may need 15 minutes everyday... but you may need 5 minutes or 40 minutes.

     So, consider scheduling something new into your daily routine... space.

Childlike Love

     No matter where I am in my life, no matter what has happened that day or week or month. My day is instantly made by the love of a child. Seriously though, I can walk into a classroom or preschool and suddenly all my worries are gone because they gave me a hug.

     Today, I returned to an elementary classroom that is very special to me and was welcomed unconditionally. It amazed me and suddenly I found myself thinking. Why are they so welcoming? How can they love so willingly? Then I thought more and started asking questions like: Why can’t all people love like this? Where does the unconditional love go once we “grow up”?

     I’m not suggesting that we all go running up to each other and envelope each other in hugs every time we see someone we know, as the students do. But rather, that we learn to appreciate others for who they are. That we learn to love, as God taught us, unconditionally.  

     I know what you are thinking, “Katie, you are crazy. I don’t love everyone. Some people I can barely tolerate.” I can answer that. Let me take you back to a time where Katie and her little sister fought… a lot. I can remember my mom saying on many occasions, “You don’t have to like your sister right now, but you have to love her.” Boom. Roasted. Mom got me. We don’t always approve of others actions or like their attitudes but we have to love others because God loved us first. Simple as that.

    So, I challenge you to think about someone in your life that you may not like. Got it? Now, I challenge you to consider whether or not you show any love to them. Let’s, you and me, reflect on that and see if it lines up with the way we want to live our lives. Love always!